Is Therapy for Me?
Sometimes, unbearable hours turn into days. If this sounds like the life you’re living, I’d like to help change that.
You feel days pass by.
It’s 6pm, and you’re finally home from work, exhausted. Still having to cook dinner, get some chores done. Maybe try to relax a bit and watch Netflix.
You reflect on your day...
...doing a bunch of things you care little about, for a bunch of people who you feel little connection with. Or feeling unappreciated by the few people who are important to you.
Some days, you wake up, and things look brighter. But these moments are fleeting. And you know the feelings of loneliness will creep up again. Rinse and repeat.
You're exhausted.
All the emotions you feel…it’s getting hard to ignore. When do you get to be yourself? When do you get to be happy?
And you've become your own biggest critic...a perfectionist. And your immigrant family, a whole other level, a story truly worthy of the therapy room.
It feels like whatever you do, it’s just not good enough. That inner critic of yours will make sure you feel awful about it.
And every once in a while, you decide that enough is enough. Maybe it’s not your fault. Maybe there’s something wrong with the world. The fucking racism. Everyone always wanting something from you. And the anger and resentment comes pouring out.
You know you can’t continue to live like this...being smothered by everyone and everything...and the never-ending emotions.
What you truly want is to become the person you know you can be, and still be loved for being you, with all your quirks and needs and desires.
You're trying your best to keep it together.
“The caged bird sings
with a fearful trill
of things unknown
but longed for still
and his tune is heard
on the distant hill
for the caged bird
sings of freedom.”
—Maya Angelou
You’re so damn sick of living this double life. On the surface, being a rule follower, the people-pleaser, who trades complacency for love and acceptance. But you know damn well this isn’t who you truly are. You dream of being…yourself. And you wonder what possibilities are out there. And it’s getting harder and harder to hold it all together.
Imagine, going to bed at night, excited for the next morning. Let's make this your reality.
You're scared of wanting more.
We can get there, but only if you’re ready for that journey.
And that journey is scary and liberating and heartbreaking, all at once. Therapy is about getting intimately acquainted with your hidden parts...the parts that stop you from taking the leap out of your mental prison.
Therapy isn’t for the faint of heart. It requires an immense amount of courage. There is no quick fix. It requires patience, as we take time to understand the deepest parts of you.
And so, the fear is very real, but the question remains, can you afford not to pursue your freedom?
It can be scary to dream of “freedom,” but can you afford not to pursue it?
But then again, you might still feel iffy about going through with therapy. I understand that push-and-pull. It’s exhausting.
You wonder if you'll ever find a therapist who *gets* you. And you’re scared to open up to someone and be judged. After all, you lived your entire life under the judgment and expectations of others.
That’s the pain of being immigrant children, of being assumed "model minorities," or worrying too much about what others want from you. You carry a huge load, and it’s suffocating the real you.
But on the flip side, you don't want a therapist who will just agree with you. No, you want someone who can challenge you...someone who can bring out your inner-BOSS, your creative self who can create a life on your own terms.
Cause if you're going to do this, you will do it RIGHT.
I see you. And I’m ready to take that step with you. Give yourself that chance, and discover what’s truly inside you. It’s time to finally show up for yourself.
Finding Freedom
Pre-Therapy Pains → Post-Therapy Changes
You feel that life isn’t going your way. But in a deeper sense, you don’t really know what you want with life. You just know that you’re unhappy. And you feel helpless to life’s circumstances, often feeling defeated.
You have an inner critic that is always criticizing you. And it makes you feel anxious all the time, like you did something wrong. You wish you can just relax.
You’re kind and generous, and want to make everyone happy. But some people take advantage of you, and some even bully or mistreat you. That leaves you feeling angry, resentful, and powerless.
At times, you wonder why you feel lonely, and find ways to distract yourself from it. You might have lots of people around you, but you don’t feel very connected to them, nor feel that they truly understand you.
You’re constantly working, and always on the verge of burn out. When you finally allow yourself to take a break, you often end up feeling uncomfortable. So you pour yourself into your work again.
Every day, you’re discovering more about yourself, and what you want in your life. You dare to dream, because you feel confident in your ability to handle the challenges that life throws at you, and keep moving towards new possibilities.
You understand your inner critic better, and that it has actually grown from wanting to help you. You now know how to be kinder to yourself. Over time, your inner critic comes up less often, and is less intense.
You’re still kind and generous. But you’ve also learned to be kind and generous to yourself. You feel different about yourself; as a result, you won’t accept other people mistreating you or bullying you.
You become better acquainted with your feelings of loneliness, and know that it is ok to feel this. As a result, you understand yourself better, and are better able to be genuine with the people around you. This makes you feel more connected and fulfilled in your relationships.
You know that you use your work as a distraction from your emotions. You now have ways to understand and process these emotions in a healthy way. Instead of using work to help you cope, you now have the clarity to reflect and prioritize your energy for things that help you live the life that you want.